Back to the Future

Inspired by my in-progress reading of The FOB Bible and some personal scripture study, I decided to try my hand religious fiction writing. Well, as much as I ever try my hand at something on the spur of the moment at least. By that I mean, I had an IDEA, I gave it a very rough FORM, and if I ever COME BACK to it, it will be an unqualified MIRACLE.

Still, tell me what you think. No title for now.
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How long have I been standing here now? It feels like years. Probably only months, though. Interesting how, even though I don’t need food any more, I still feel hungry. I’d really like to eat something.

I know: nachos. I’ve always loved nachos, and you don’t have to kill anything to get good ones. Those should be okay here, right? Just some really good yellow tortilla chips with cheddar, pepper jack, and some fresh pico. Mmm.

At least my feet aren’t sore.

This is pretty depressing, though. Everyone is crying. No wonder too, seeing as they’re hearing all the sins of every person ever born. I’ve heard things that make me want to weep.

Actually, I guess I have now and then. I should have realized that the first step to becoming omniscient would be to learn everything about my own world and its history.

And I mean everything. Not what I’d call an easy experience, or pleasant.

Of course, there have been some nice stories, too. People have done some really great things. I guess one advantage of not having to eat is that I don’t have to go to the bathroom, either. Not that there’d be one here if I needed it.

All right. Come on. Pay attention. Who’s that up there now? I don’t think I know him, but the woman behind him looks familiar. I missed their names. Passed them in traffic once, maybe? I don’t know.

It sure is beautiful here. Long and lovely, just like I knew it would be. The celestial glory part doesn’t hurt either.

You know, I’ve always wondered how many people I’d have to be judged by. I mean, I was alive for several prophets’ ministries, I had two mission presidents, and countless bishops and stake presidents, not to mention my parents and the big figures like Adam, Joseph Smith, and Moroni. All the relevant dispensation heads.

In the end, I’m glad it’s just Him. Sure, everybody gets to hear about my sins. I really hope I won’t be able to see my mom from up there. But at least they don’t get the final decision. I’ve done some pretty good things in my life. I’ve tried hard. Not perfect, but who is?

Oh yeah.

Like I said. I’m really glad it’s Him.

Also, I’m really glad I didn’t start repenting yesterday. Well, I was here yesterday, but I mean the most recent yesterday on which I wasn’t here. Otherwise there’d be a lot more to tell about me.

Wait a sec. All these things I’m hearing. What about all the ones I’m not hearing.

Sniff

All those tears. Yeah. Glad I’m not the judge either.

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Hey! Is that guy eating nachos?